I admit. I'm struggling as a single. I've been single a long time and I don't want to stay single all my life--BUT, if I'm going to be single, then I want to be right. If God is preparing me for a mate, then I want him to be satisfied knowing that he has found a 'good thing'. As you know from my previous entries, there is someone that I'm interested in. He seems to be a nice guy, but I'm reluctant to start a relationship with him. What's the hold up? Me.
Why? Well, I ask myself "if I'm attracted to this man, what reason would I have to say no to sex?" I read somewhere--oh yeah...in my "Marriage and Family" class, the text we're reading is Marriage, a History...by Stephanie Coontz. Good reading. Well, the book tells the history of marriage from its beginnings, the church's role and societies thoughts on relationships, sex, etc. --anyway-- after the Enlightenment, men looked to women to be their 'moral compass' --you know, keep them in line as far as sexual urges. Which ties into what my Pastor said a couple or 3 weeks ago --that men need women to say "no". A man wants to know how far can he go. And he will definitely take a woman as far as she let him. Well, I've been down that 'yellow brick road' before. Uhhhh let's just say the trip wasn't all that bad...but the consequences for going...that's a whole 'nother thing! But even at that, why would I, or should I say 'no' to sex? That's a good question. I found good answers as well. Remember, I'm talking to me.
Number 1) I say I am a follower of Christ, yet if I am out in the world fornicating and carrying on like all of the lost people of the world, then I am not what I say I am. And I ain't fooling nobody but myself! If I've truly accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior, then I should not still be ruled by my flesh! (AND, this goes back to the salt { see: "Get this in your Spirit on the sidebar to the right --> --> } cuz if I'm doing what you doing, then I've lost my flavor to influence you in the right way-- and oooh I have a testimony on this!! next blog, I promise...) Scripture tells us in 1 Corinthians 6:13b, 18, "Now the body is not for fornication, but for the Lord; and the Lord for the body. Flee fornication. Every sin that a man does is without (outside) the body; but he that commits fornication sins against his own body."
Number 2) If I have sexual relations with someone I'm not married to, a little bit of my soul dies in a way. I've given away something that is valuable and precious. I've given this person my wealth and my honor. And that's TOO MUCH. 1 Corinthians 6:20 reads: For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's.
Number 3) I am to keep my body. If I disrespect my body, so will others. If I don't respect my mind, body, soul, my very life as valuable, who else will? 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, "For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication: that every one of you should know how to possess his vessel (body) in sanctification and honor, not in lust of concupiscence, even as the Gentiles which do not know God."
what's concupiscence? according to Merriam-Webster it means: a strong desire ; especially sexual desire.
The New Living Translation says: It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen (lust of concupisence), who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. { I had to add verse 6 of NLT...it's just too important to pass up.}
Now in my previous entry "Living Single", I talked a little about self-pleasuring. I'm getting out of the first person here...I'm talking to us now... This is 'self-abuse'. It's abuse because we are improperly handling something (our bodies and minds) that God entrusted to our care. We are taking our bodies and minds, the gifts that God gave us, and using them in a perverse manner. When self-pleasuring, you are defiling your mind with obscene thoughts and then defiling your body by using it to act out those thoughts. To "defile" something means "to make unclean, to make impure." Although the Bible does not speak on self-pleasuring, we do read this in Matthew 15:19-20a "For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications ...these are the things that defile a man."
Before you disagree--just think about it. Everything you do, starts in the mind with a thought. Self-pleasuring is no different--it starts with a thought, then you follow thru with an action. And then when that action no longer satisfies, the same thought leads to other actions...and another action--it grows like a rolling snowball. But, when you let the Son shine-- the snow melts!
And just one last word for any of you who are unbelievers. I know I probably get on your nerves, quoting Scripture and talking about the love of God, and Jesus is the Light... and so on...so there are two thoughts I'd like to leave with you. Ponder them if you will:
simply beautiful's actions don't save me. But, the fact that I am saved should show itself in my actions.
Secondly, God loves you and He has a plan for your life. Be forever blessed.
simply beautiful.
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