Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Black Love at its Finest

Hey Y'all. What's the what? I just read a headline about the media's take on Black Love. In particular, the media is 'flabbergasted' by the fact that the President and First Lady actually love each other and have a good marriage. Imagine. Who would've thunk that black folk actually have relationships based upon mutual love, trust, honesty, and respect? The headline leads me to think that the media believes all black folk do is cuss, cut, and kill each other. Can't we all just get along?

Yes, statistics show that the black family is in trouble. Statistics also show that single black women are heads of household and raising children alone, more than any other race. 70 percent of African-American families are headed by a single woman, either never married or divorced. I know. I'm one of them. I chose to stay single and pregnant over being miserably married.

But, in my world, I feel the norm for the African-American community is to be married with kids. How could the media miss that? As I was growing up, I knew many married couples; happy, loving couples and raising happy, loving families--like The Jacksons, The Chandlers, The Thompsons...not to mention my Grand-parents, and my Great-Uncles and Aunts. Granted, the difference may be that my parents generation and those before them married, and stayed married. But the generations that followed either never married, or married, divorced, and remarried or remained single. But, even that is not the point.

The point is that African-Americans are looked upon as being different. We have always been ostracized and patronized and all other -ized in between... What I'm getting at is that America and the rest of the world thinks that black folks do not respect the institution of marriage nor uphold the family and family values. Truth be told, I believe family values originated in the black community. I know black men who love and respect their wives, who support and nurture their children, and are involved in their communities. Not all black men are walking around with their pants hanging low, involved in drug dealing, gambling or other illegal activities. I know hard working men, at General Motors, at Sealy Mattress, at McDonalds and Church's Chicken even. Military men, Men who pastor churches, mentor boys without fathers at home, and feed the hungry and homeless. Good, God-fearing men. They don't have a lot of money, but they love God, family and country.

And Black women. We always get the short end of the stick. We're not all Hottentot, child support seeking, gold-diggers looking for the next rap video in which to star. We work hard, too--loving our good Black men, raising children, biological or not--working at AT&T, Lockheed, Taco Bell or Popeye's chicken. We serve in the local church, mentor young girls, and volunteer to make our communities better. We are God-fearing women who respect our Black men as heads of household, protectors, and leaders. We may not have all that we want, but we sure know how to appreciate what we have.

A word to the media--PAY ATTENTION: Black woman speaking here. Stop looking at African-Americans as an uncouth race of people. We love each other--hard. Yes, as a people we have serious problems. But look at our history. We've always been a people who place God first, family next and job third. That's been our m.o. for hundreds of years now. And if you have need, which you must, here are some examples of loving Black couples--

Dr. and Mrs. Martin L. King, Jr.

Ossie Davis and Ruby Dee
David and Tamela Mann

and don't forget--Malcolm X and Betty Shabazz, Magic and Cookie Johnson, and of course Barack and Michelle Obama!! These couples exemplify Black Love at it's finest. And they are...

simply beautiful!!

Love Day 2009 - Countdown #2

Okay, I'm back again today to give some tips for you and yours leading up to "Love Day '09". Feel free to add your own twists to these suggestions--just be sure you do something for the one you love ( or seriously like ). He/She will appreciate your efforts, for everyone wants to feel like they are special to someone.

the 4th tip:
Go out for a special treat—ice cream, cheesecake, chocolate cake-- really-- any dessert. I suggest Braum's, Cold Stone, or the Cheesecake Factory. You might try an appetizer, drinks and dessert at Chili's, TGI Fridays..... or any fine restaurant of choice and remember, drink responsibly!
Tip Number five:
Fireplace or Living Room Picnic--that's right, it’s still cold out. But there’s no reason you can’t have a picnic. Bring out the picnic blanket, fry some chicken, potato salad...or go simple... fix sandwiches, chips, and red kool-aid. Turn on some summertime music and enjoy a romantic inside picnic!

And number 6:
This will depend on the weather and the view-- Enjoy a sunset together. If you're creative you can arrange to have dinner in front of a picture window that faces west. Or just find a hill, park the car, enjoy some nice music on the radio or better yet--just talk, cuddle, and enjoy God's beautiful sunset.. And IF you are really adventurous, meet on an early morning to watch the sunrise and have breakfast together. Your sweetie will appreciate your thoughtfulness and creativity--and the fact that you think he/she is special enough to spend some time enjoying God's best creations--the opposite sex and nature. I know I would...(hint, hint for any of you single men who find simply beautiful is simply beautiful...(smile, blush)....u can contact me by email at seeinsideofme@gmail.com.... really, I don't bite!)

Happy Dating!!

simply beautiful.... wanting a simple love....

Tribute to J

Jun. 3, 1983- Feb. 10, 2006

You are a ray of sunshine that warmed the heart.

You always had a smile and a hug to
show us God's love.
Your assignment's done. Rest in peace.

I miss you baby 'cuz. You inspired me because you lived your life as if it was....simply beautiful

A Prayer for Help

Lord, help!
guide me,
protect me,
strengthen me.
Give me wisdom,
to love,
to hope,
to forgive
and to move forward.
In Jesus' Name. Amen.

c.18Oct2005 Fort Worth TX simply beautiful

Saturday, January 24, 2009

A Poem about Love

Let him love the love in you
For love is what he's made to do
Let him love you through and through
He’ll be honest, kind, and true.

Let him be the love in you
a love so full a love so new
he'll love you to your very core
Today you are alone no more
Let love enter your heart’s door
With all respect, let him adore
And let him love you evermore.

Love him too until that day
That love and dreams just fly away.

Let him love as he longs to
For yes, his love is meant for you
A love so strong for just you two
Love so mighty, love so true
His Love is tender, and so sweet
Love intertwined as two hearts beat
So easy, yes and so complete,
So full of passion, so full of heat.

Let him love the love in you
He lives just for your love, it's true
For love in him, and love in you
belongs to Him, belongs to you
To honor, keep and cherish too
'Cause love in him is what's in you
Until the day your days are through.

Let love have it's proper time.
For I am his and he is mine.
the love between us genuine.
Until the very end of time.
Let him love the love in me,
Love is what it's meant to be.
Let's love until the very day,
Life's heartaches and pains just fly away.
Love until our days are through,
For love in me is love in you,
For loving me is loving you.

copyright 01/24/2009 ftw tx/simply beautiful
modified 04/15/2009 simply beautiful

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

January 20, 2009 Inauguration Day

Introducing...President Elect and Family as he takes the oath of the highest office in the land:

The President of the United States of America-- Barack H. Obama!!!!

Signed, Sealed, Delivered!!!

May I......

have this dance?

simply beautiful.

Monday, January 19, 2009

MLK Day 2009 excerpt from "The Drum Major Instinct"

I'd like somebody to mention that day that Martin Luther King, Jr., tried to give his life serving others. (Yes)
I'd like for somebody to say that day that Martin Luther King, Jr., tried to love somebody.
I want you to say that day that I tried to be right on the war question. (Amen)
I want you to be able to say that day that I did try to feed the hungry. (Yes)
And I want you to be able to say that day that I did try in my life to clothe those who were naked. (Yes)
I want you to say on that day that I did try in my life to visit those who were in prison. (Lord)
I want you to say that I tried to love and serve humanity. (Yes)
Yes, if you want to say that I was a drum major, say that I was a drum major for justice. (Amen) Say that I was a drum major for peace. (Yes) I was a drum major for righteousness. And all of the other shallow things will not matter. (Yes) I won't have any money to leave behind. I won't have the fine and luxurious things of life to leave behind. But I just want to leave a committed life behind. (Amen) And that's all I want to say.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Strong, Grown, and Sexy

My friend sent me a poem today entitled: "Grown Woman". Basically, the poem is about how girls vs. women act/react in relationships with men. I decided to break it down and add my own twist and instead of a poem, it'll be a mini-essay.

*Grown Women do not want to control the man in her life. She knows if he's truly hers, he doesn't need controlling. If he is her man, then he's committed to love, respect, and care for her. If he chooses not to, she will let him go knowing that it's his loss.
*Little girls are insecure and will check a man for not calling. Grown women are too busy to realize he hadn't.
*Strong and Grown women revel in being alone and use it as a time for personal growth. She will read and meditate on the Word, take in some arts and culture, exercise, or she might even dress herself up and go out to dinner and a movie--by herself.
*Little girls beg and whine to make her man come home. Grown women make him want to come home. He can't wait to get there. (Do you want it on your rice and gravy? Do you want it on your biscuits baby? Do you want it on your black-eyed peas...give it to me...give it to me... LOL...Jill Scott's my girrrl!! )
*Girls sit by the phone all day long, waiting for the man to make plans for the evening-- and when she ends up home alone, she pouts because his plans don't include hanging with her. A grown woman will make her own plans and nicely tell the guy "to get in where you fit in."
*A Strong, Grown and Sexy black woman knows that she's pretty--no, she knows she's simply beautiful and is more than good enough for any man. She's confident in this because that's the way God made her.
*Girls try to monopolize all their man's time--she don't want him hanging with his friends or his family. Grown women realize that a lil' bit of space makes the 'together time' even more special-and encourages him to hang his boys. And while he's with his boys, she not at home pouting, she goes to kick it with her own friends. And since we're on the subject of friends, a grown woman IS NOT intimidated by the fact that her man has female friends. She's grown enough to discern when they are just friends and nothing more. She's not naive-- mind you, but neither does she feel the need to challenge him on his relationships with his female friends. And she's certainly not intimidated by another woman or girl admiring her man. See, she knows that if she finds him attractive, it's a compliment to her good taste if another finds him attractive also. Grown women don't want a man that look like the dog just dug him up and drug him in! He's got to be neat, clean, fine, dressed well, and good looking-- whether he's in a suit or a t-shirt and some jeans. And little girls remember, just look--don't touch...or there will be consequences and repercussions.
*Little girls think a guy who0 cries is weak. Strong and Grown women offer their shoulder and some tissue. Hell, it's better that he's able to deal with his feelings and his emotions through talking and tears than for him to come in and unexpectantly shove your head through a wall just because he's angry!
*Little girls want to be spoiled and whine all about it to their man. Grown and Sexy women will spoil their man first and be sure he's comfortable enough to reciprocate without fear of losing his 'manhood'.
*Girls get hurt by one man and make all men pay for it. Strong women know that he was just one man. Love hurts sometimes and we must move on. Think of it this way, God had to move the wrong one out of the way so that the right one could come in.
*Girls fall in love and chase aimlessly after the object of their affection, ignoring all signs. Grown women know that sometimes the one you focus on, doesn't always respond in kind-but it's okay... move on without bitterness. Who God has for you is for you.
Truth be told, it's easy to be a little girl. But it takes maturity, transparency, humility, self-confidence, God-confidence, inner strength, and trust to be Strong, Grown, and Sexy. She must have God's Word in her, be able to pray God's protection over her and hers, and be willing to allow God to guide her daily. Now as humans, we have our insecurities--and we're not going to always be on point. Just realize this: Being 'Strong' is about being in God. Being 'Grown' or mature is recognizing and acknowledging shortcomings and making a true effort to improve. And being 'Sexy' is not all about sex... let's be real, but it is about being beautiful and attractive for yourself first, then for the opposite sex. And to be 'Grown and Sexy' is when you're at a point in life where playing games and immaturity is a thing of the past. There's no more foolishness because you are ready to take on bigger and better things. The Strong, Grown and Sexy is aware of her worth, she's loving, elegant, poised, controls her temper, and secure in who she is and Whose she is. That's what makes her exciting, attractive, and irresistable.
So, little girls, stop wallowing in the muck and mire of immaturity. Woman up! Join the sect of the Strong, Grown, and Sexy!

Thursday, January 1, 2009

A Smile and a Switch

I know he's watching me...maybe waiting for the right time to approach me? I ask myself, 'what does he want from me?' Now, don't get me wrong-- I consider myself a fairly decent looking woman. I mean I comb my hair, wash my face and brush my teeth on the daily. LOL. But, all kidding aside... I guess he thinks I'm cute because he steals glances at me, or he just stares (which makes me nervous). But, what I like is that he ALWAYS looks me in the face. He's not staring at my chest, he's not looking me up and down, or stretching his neck around trying to see my butt, or sucking his teeth and hollering "OOOOwWeeee!!" (oh-- I just hate that!!) He's a gentleman and I love that! When I'm facing him, we have eye to eye contact. Now, when I'm walking away from him, I don't know what he's looking at. (Honestly, I doubt it's the back of my head-- cuz sistah got...well... let's just say a large posterior. LOL.) But coming back to my question--what does he want? What does he see in me? Well, I can tell from watching him that he's a man who is sold out to the Lord. He's a man of good taste, he has a sense of humor, he's articulate, mannerable, intelligent and he's humble. He likes the newest tech toys. He believes in taking care of his car--you should see it--it's always spit-shined, spotless and clean. He's good at his occupation and puts his heart in it. Nothing wrong with any of that. And being that he's a man of God, surely he's not wanting me as a 'friend with benefits'. So, what would he be looking for? Well, knowing that he likes nice things. And he likes me. So to him, I must be a nice thing. AND He takes good care of his nice things. Therefore, he'd take good care of me. But that's all about him, isn't it? Does he see that I'm a sold out Christian, a nice young, single mother? I work hard, I'm a college student, I have a wicked and warped sense of humor, believe in family, and I love music. Does he see any of that? Yes, he probably does, and more than what I realize he sees as well. Now, he obviously has good taste, is smart, employed, talented, and upwardly mobile-- and really, all that sounds too good to be true--and what usually sounds too good to be true, is just that. So I can't help but wonder, what are his flaws? MMMmm. I wonder...
Anyway, you probably wonder why I titled this entry 'A smile and a switch'? Well... R U ready for this? R U sure? ...it's because, "Girrrrl, he put a smile on my face and a switch in my hips." LOL. Yes, indeed! He puts a smile on my face--- It's nice to have someones attention. I really like the fact that he's liking me. And I'm liking him back. I like that he watches me--and that he seems to look forward to seeing me each week. He puts a switch in my hips.--- whenever I get the chance to walk past him, I put a little extra 'oomph' in my walk. Yeah, you know, right about in the hip area. Hell, why not? Like I said, this babysistah's got back. And I know he's watching me.